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Joke of the Day

"I used to be a People Person, but People ruined it for me!!!"

"I just took out a spider so big that, moments after, the postman rang the doorbell and I thought it was the spider."

"Why did the teacher have trouble controlling her pupils? She was cross eyed."

"the average person eats three spiders a year, but as you're about to find out, it takes an entire year for three spiders to eat a person"

"So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem? comes out of nowhere."

"If love didn't hurt, it wouldn't be called love...it would be called tacos."

"I started a three-way with a Chicken and Egg. I'll let you know."

"*the fog lifts* *the fog eats a high protein-low fat diet* *the fog does cardio* *the fog is fit af*"

"Man texted: ""I want you to be my little angle."" I answered: ""Do you want me to be obtuse, right, or acute?"" Two days have passed, no reply."

"After my wife died, I haven't been able to look at other women for 10 years... But now that I'm out of prison I can honestly say that it was worth it."