160345

Joke of the Day

"Everyone's always talking about our forefathers... I'm pretty sure there were more than that."

"Is 1+1 hard to calculate? It's not complex at all, right?"

"What do Jimmy Carter and the Long Island Railroad have in common? They both pull out of Roslyn every morning at 8:15."

"Courtesy of my 8-year-old : Knock knock Who's there Europe Europe who? No, you're a poo!"

"Two cannibals are eating a clown. One cannibal looks at the other cannibal and says ""hey, does this taste funny?"""

"[US] THIS WOULD BE GREAT ON NETFLIX!! I'm still waiting for that porno category..."

"So I ordered a pizza I ordered a funghi pizza yesterday but I was pretty disappointed.. They obviously have mushroom for improvement"

"Sure, your carpenter could turn water into wine, Father. Now let ME tell you about a plumber who can increase his size by eating mushrooms."

"HISTORICAL FACT: I moved to Miami too, but I didn't make such a big fucking deal about it."

"Q: Why did the blonde get so excited after she finished her jigsaw puzzle in only 6 months? A: Because on the box it said From 2-4 years."