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Joke of the Day

"""Let's make sure there's 3 miles of handicap parking."" -Walmart"

"Post the most offensive jokes you can think of The child abuser motto: hit them before puberty does"

"What's the difference between Bill and Hillary Clinton? One wants their aides to keep their mouth closed, the other wants them to keep their mouth open."

"Why did the apple eat itself with a fork? Because it didn't have a spoon! (Courtesy of my three year old daughter.)"

"Brazil's congress. thats the joke, folks..."

"I like first aid classes its the only time I get to be touched by a caring human."

"How do you tune a fish? With its scales!"

"What did 0 say to 8 ? Nice belt!"

"What is America worth? Nothing, it's a free country."

"I may be getting old but not ""doesn't know what day of the week it is"" old. I can tell by which day I open on my daily pill organizer."