209705

Joke of the Day

"I like first aid classes its the only time I get to be touched by a caring human."

"If anyone thinks I'm a homophobe they can suck my dick. Unless they're a man, because that's unnatural."

"how do you know if an asian man robbed your house your homeworks done, your computers upgraded, and 3 hours later hes still trying to back out the driveway."

"How do you make a double bass sound in tune? Chop it up an turn it into a xylophone"

"My dad hasn't uncrossed his arms since I was born."

"*opens door* Stop screaming! *opens door* What broke?! *opens door* Just wait until I get out there!! ~parenting from the bathroom"

"What do you call bovine masturbation? Beef stroganoff!"

"Why was Luke Skywalker late? He didn't run, ewok-ed."

"There are two types of people in this world. Those that need closure..."

"I have a gay friend but I never recognize him Because he is always in these guys."