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Joke of the Day

"What do a cheap robot and a high class prostitute have in common They both stop working for you after you pee on them."

"Keen silence from a dinner guest as she looks across the living room and realizes I made her bridesmaid dress into a dog bed."

"Did you hear Woody stabbed his best friend? What a Buzz kill"

"What do you call a counterfeit receipt for a memory consultant? A Freudilent slip."

"Why did they have to stop playing water-polo in Poland? All the horses drowned"

"He asked: how do you feel about sex? She replied: Well i like it infrequently. He said: is that one word or two?"

"What are the options? Air Hostess to passenger: ""Sir would you like to have dinner?"" Passenger: ""What are the options?"" Air Hostess: ""Yes and No."""

"Whenever I use idioms in the wrong context... ...people look at me as if I'm as thick as thieves!"

"Happy Greek Easter! Which Greek God loved to collect animals? Zoos"

"Why did jesus take 3 days to resurrect? He got hammered with his buddies."