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Joke of the Day

"What's a dyslexic stoner's favorite phone brand? HTC."

"What happens when you cross a snowman and a vampire? You get a frostbite."

"The best jokes are the ones that have to be explained. Get it? Because that's the opposite of the truth, I was using sarcasm."

"What about ""BusinessMyspace""? Nah, it's taken. Okay, what about ""LinkedIn""?"

"It's my epileptic friend's birthday soon so I got him a strobe light. He's going to have a fucking fit when he sees it."

"I used to work in a mental institution, but I kept getting blood all over my hands. *menstrual"

"The bartender says... ""We don't serve tachyons here."" A tachyon walks into a bar."

"Self esteem so low, you crop yourself out of your selfie."

"Coma's can really change the meaning of a sentence... For instance: * Hillary is in a hurry. * Hillary is in a coma."

"I've seen so many Adam Sandler films... it's not even funny."