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Joke of the Day

"How come Smokey the Bear doesn't have any kids? Because everytime his wife gets hot ,he covers her with dirt and beats her with a shovel. :-P"

"My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad I had to take his bike away."

"A brother and sister are having sex The sister tells her brother: You are better than dad. To which the brother replies: I know, mom told me."

"Why did the raisin go out with a prune? He couldn't get a date!"

"What did the egg say to the boiling water? Sorry I can't get hard right now. I just got laid."

"When I die... I just want 2016 to be my pallbearer, so it can let me down one last time."

"My dad told me to be the best I can be and to always be at the top I told him ""I am at the top ...... of a bell curve"""

"What's the difference between your dick and your jokes? Nobody laughs at your jokes."

"Google Page 2 The best place to hide a dead body is Google Page2."

"I had to pay $150 for the bowel prep medication before my colonoscopy. That shit was expensive. (Crosspost from r/funny. This fits better here.)"