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Joke of the Day

"If there were no food left what could people do? Country people could eat their forest preserves and city people could have their traffic jams."

"I was beaten to a lead role in a film, and have planned to get my revenge with Matt Damon ever since. I'll make him wish he'd never been Bourne."

"Never vote for a tunnel-digging politician Because he's probably just another burrowcrat."

"Did you hear the one about the three eggs? Too Bad."

"what's the difference between two dicks and a joke you don't look like you could take a joke"

"Jersey Shore just got cancelled. Clearly an act of God. Your move, atheists."

"What do cars do at the disco? Brake dance."

"A new hipster coffee shop in my hood doesn't have wifi b/c it wants to encourage talking...presumably about the failure of this coffee shop."

"So if multiple cactus is cacti... NSFW Would a cat (animal) be cat-i?"

"I don't know why I just bought some coconut shampoo I haven't even got any coconuts."