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Joke of the Day

"And the Lord said unto John, ""Come forth and you shall receive eternal life"". But John came in fifth and won a toaster."

"Not all astrophysicists are bad. I'm sure at least one of them's a really Feynman."

"I think New York has reached the point where it can finally be called York."

"Concentration Camps (x-post from /r/Poems) Guess Who? It's a Jew Concentration camps for You! Boo Hoo! It's a Haiku F*** You. Edit: I know it's not a haiku."

"What is a horse's favourite sport? Stable tennis!"

"What's the different between E.T. and a refugee? E.T. learned English and wanted to go home"

"I understand the beautiful part, Cover Girl. But isn't ""easy breezy"" just another way to say ""slutty and flatulent?"""

"Time out. Otters not only sleep holding hands, but have a SPECIAL POCKET to hold their favorite rock? Humans are bullshit."

"Me: Nice biker jacket. You ride? Him: No Me: So you're a liar? Him: Me: Him: Nice yoga pants Me: That jacket looks so awesome on you!"

"Is Lobster Bisque a good rap name?"