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Joke of the Day
"What was the name of the pharao that screwed everything up? Ineptitut."
Next Joke
"Saw @justinbieber on a piece of toast. Am I going to hell?"
"First thing this morning, there was a tap on my door... My plumber sure has a strange sense of humor..."
"It's not the size of the ship nor the motion in the ocean...it's whether the Captain can stay in port long enough for all the passengers to get off.."
"Why was the hamster a bad Supreme Court Justice? Because his mind was always on a pellet."
"The Zika virus can now be transmitted sexually. Luckily, most of you have nothing to worry about."
"Sorry I'm late, guys. SOMEbody.. *gestures at wife* told me this knife fight started at.. *sees everyone holding guns* FANtastic, Ellen"
"When Lionel Messi dies.. He should have his Argentinian team mates bury him so they can let him down one last time.."
"WELL WELL WELL, if it isn't the lady who's baby I stole."
"What is the friendliest kind of aircraft? A Hello-copter."