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Joke of the Day

"They say what kills you in your past life is your biggest fear in this life.. But I'm pretty sure premature ejaculation never killed anyone"

"I went to a vegan restaurant once. Wait, no, that was just a florist."

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Chopin ! Chopin who ? Chopin the supermarket !"

"What's Hitler's favorite videogame? Mein Kraft."

"wish I never spent that $20 my grandma gave me when I was 12, I could really use it right now"

"My dad said, always leave them wanting more. Ironically, that's how he lost his job in disaster relief."

"My boss just fired me because I spent the past 45 minutes taking a crap. I don't see why he can't just clean it off his desk, and move on."

"Some kid just threw a bottle of milk at me HOW DAIRY! His behaviour was udderly disgusting. It just skimmed my head."

"Q: What kind of guitar did the pool player own? A: A-cue-stick."

"Sun Tzu's The Art of War is very applicable in the business world. Just today I made my boss sit facing the window so he had sun in his eyes"