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Joke of the Day

"Back in my day, we didn't watch TV while we ate dinner. We actually talked to each other. It was awful."

"Did You Hear About the Man who was Arrested for Possessing NaCl and an Electrical Source? He was arrested for a salt and battery!"

"What do you call a slice of bread from another country? An immigraint."

"""how would you like your steak prepared?"" i'd like the chefs to work together and try their best and most of all have fun"

"Things i use duct tape for, by percentage: Pranks: 35% Car repair: 35% Wrapping presents: 20% Medical emergencies: 10% Ducts: 0%"

"A wizard and a vampire walk in to a bar The Wizard says, ""Let me buy you a drink old friend,"" The Vampire says, ""One chicken please!"""

"I heard 80% of all accident happen within 10 miles of home. So I moved."

"today i won a raffle. received a life supply of marmite, one whole jar."

"Any subreddits to help you cope with schizophrenia? Asking for a friend"

"Why are there gay aliens on mars? Because curiosity got the best of them."