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Joke of the Day
"What's the worst part about being a gay bathhouse attendant? Shitty tips."
Next Joke
"A friend of mine asked me, ""what rhymes with orange?"" I said, ""no, it doesn't"". *Credit to Jimmy Carr.* **Edit:** ITT: door hinge, syringe, whore binge, Blorenge."
"How many South Americans does it take to change a lightbulb? A Brazilian."
"My wife and I are working on our marriage. She's more attentive to my needs and I've mostly stopped telling other women I'm a single father."
"America where we celebrate Memorial Day with mattress sales."
"Wanna hear a cheesy conspiracy? Halluminati"
"Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A: 'ell if I know."
"Smart man + Smart Woman = Romance Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Pregnancy Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Affair Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = Marriage"
"Q: What do you call that great feeling of satisfaction you get when you finish your homework? A: The aftermath."
"Boss: you're late Me: traffic Carol: he was in his car taking selfies again Me: goddammit Carol, I will cut you"