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Joke of the Day

"A neutron went into a bar and asked the bartender, ""How much for a beer?"" The bartender replied, ""For you, no charge."""

"If you pluck a hair out of Hitler's head... ...do you now have a root of all evil?"

"A number fight there was this 1,2,3,4,5,6,7 ganging on a 0, he tightened his belt and became an 8 and beat them all"

"Why did the hipster burn the roof of his mouth? He ate his pizza before it was cool. (Written anonymously in the bathroom at work, a pizza joint.)"

"New Thesaurus I bought a new thesaurus, it's terrible. It's also terrible."

"Travelers to India joke that the country name is an acronym for, I'll Never Do It Again!"

"What do you call Batman and Robin after they got run over by a steamroller? Flatman and Ribbon"

"""WAIT!"" I screamed at my daughter as she typed Y-O-U on my computer but miraculously the autocomplete added ""TUBE"" so yeah, God exists."

"I asked my friends how they decided they were going to have a baby... They said it was just sperm of the moment."

"Gay people are such great dressers because they've spent a lot of time in the closet."