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Joke of the Day

"I socially identify as the guy who tried to jump off of the sinking Titanic but ending up hitting a massive propeller on the way down."

"In Russia, we get reddit banned! Cause you know.... the recent ban on reddit."

"Three blind lesbians walk into a fish market. They get confused"

"What do you call a small Mexican? A paragraph."

"A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother."

"America Found Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. Maria: This is it. Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? Class: Maria did."

"Why did all the black people die in the war? Because when they captain said, ""GET DOWN!"" They all started dancing.."

"So my math teacher asked what I did over Thanksgiving... (-1)/8"

"I've lost all ability to feel... I'm numb.... I'm starting to slip away... I look forward to the empty, meaningless void Now pull the damn tooth, Doctor"

"During sexual intercourse Jimmy suddenly stops and becomes motionless.. .. Girl: What the heck are you doing?? Jimmy: I have seen this on adult porn sites, it's called ""buffering"""