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Joke of the Day
"Can't sleep because I'm afraid I'm going to miss the apocalypse."
Next Joke
"It's confusing for me too, but I don't need your money so you're going to have to be a nice guy if this is going to work out."
"Cocaine so white it looks around the room before saying ""nigga"""
"*reheats leftovers from yesterday's dinner date* *takes bite* *waiter from last night knocks on window* ""how's everything tasting folks"""
"How do al-Qaeda like their toast? Bean-laden"
"The one Pacifist friend. Pacifist friend: ""Do you want to hear my war-cry?"" *cries his eyes out while watching two dogs fighting*"
"Which fairground ride is made of iron? The ferrous wheel"
"Jared from Subway Apparently Subway is removing the foot long from the Kids menu"
"A man was found dead in an ice cream van covered in nuts and sprinkles Police say he topped himself"
"This morning there was large spider in my bath. I should really stop stealing equipment from the snooker club."