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Joke of the Day

"A snake slithers into a bar... The bartender says, ""I'm sorry but I can't serve you."" ""Why not?"" asks the snake. The bartender says, ""Because you can't hold your liquor."""

"What happens when you throw a hand grenade into a kitchen? Well, the mess is the same but the annoying jabbering stops."

"I'm sick of this condescending parrot making fun of the way I talk."

"The reason I love mushrooms Cause just like mushrooms... I'm a fun guy."

"What do you call a sexy BLONDE that understands what you're saying? A MissUnderstanding!"

"Someone asked me if I used mustache wax. I said no, but it helps to have a runny nose."

"87.53% of statistics are false Title"

"Yo mamma so stupid when she heard of ""orange is the new black"" she thought Donald Trump became the president."

""" Wife: there is a man at the door with a mustache. Husband: tell him i've already got one. """

"What do an anorexic girl and the UK have in common? They both lose pounds really fast."