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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between a catholic priest and acne? The priest doesn't wait for you to hit puberty to come on your face."

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"Fuck you KFC with your ""we don't serve hot dogs"" and your ""we don't accept $30 bills""."
"Coldplay is doing charity work in an African hospital. They met a few jaundice patients. Chris Martin said 'It was great. They were all yellow'"
"Scientists find new way to measure pregnancy Placentage"
"Hey guys, I think I just got murdered but I'm not sure, and WebMD is like ZERO help."
"GOD: Peter, you will be heaven's bouncer ST PETER: What the hell, I don't want ST BERNARD (whispering): Shut up or he'll make you a dog"
"I want to surprise my boyfriend by sending him a sexy pic while he's at work, but I can't decide what outfit to put on the cat."
"""The 1st Amendment is a magical shield that protects you from any consequences after publically posting your opinions online."" - idiots"
"The best part of being a crackhead.... Only two more sleeps until Christmas."
"What does Joan Jett use when her lips are chapped? Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-cherry balm!"