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Joke of the Day

"A physicist sees a man about to jump off the Empire State Building... He yells ""Don't do it! You have so much potential!"""

"got 1 of those water bottles w/ the plastic prison inside 4 putting fruit in. i'm gonna put donut in it. donut water.for health n prosperity"

"A good friend bails you out of jail, a best friend is sitting in the cell right next to you, a worst friend framed both of you for murder."

"What did Cinderella say when she sat on Pinocchio's face? Tell me a lie. Tell me the truth. Tell me a lie. Tell me the truth. Tell me a lie..."

"A terrorist walks into a pet store and says ""You have 5 minutes to get out of here...I'm going to blow myself up."" Tortoise : Dafuq :-/"

"Long John Silver's is the perfect representation of corporate greed. Nearly everything that company does is selfish."

"A horse walks into a bar Several people got up and left at the potential danger in the situation."

"I'm getting tired of politicians using blanket statements It's putting me to sleep"

"Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The Bartender says, ""Hey, Rene, you want a scotch?"" Descartes replies, ""No, I think not."" And then he vanishes. No dice."

"My boyfriend broke up with me today He said he wanted to celebrate Independence day"