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Joke of the Day

"""The moon is so close to earth right now""... ...""You can probably see it from space"""

"My future wife is... probably texting her boyfriend right now, saying how they are going to be together forever. SIKE! See you in 10 years bitch!"

"So I finally got Pokemon GO... I still haven't caught any Counter-Terrorists."

"What did John Wilkes Boothe's stage partner wish him on the day of that tragic night? Break a leg. So he jumped off the balcony... Sorry that I am not funny."

"Yo mama is so fat... That the sorting hat put her in the waffle house!"

"Executive: What should we name the mutant with neato magnetic powers? Me: [clearly joking] How about Mag-Neato? Exec: damn that's so good"

"Happy New Year Reddit! Just Kidding you really came for my cake day! Happy 1 Year Reddit"

"What do you call a magical dog? Labracadabrador!!!"

"The new mouthwash I bought says ""24 HOUR PROTECTION ....use twice daily"""

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Beets ! Beets who ? Beets me but I just forgot the joke !"