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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a magical dog? Labracadabrador!!!"

"If he doesn't sleep with a life-sized replica of you made of human hair and deli meats, he's not as into you as I am."

"This is overexaggerated. 1/x"

"PARK RANGER: to be a guide you need to be able to name all the animals ME: no problem [later w/ a group] ME: that's Greg, & that's Linda..."

"I wouldn't give my brother up for anyone else... Because human trafficking is illegal."

"A friend of mine told me she met a really cute boy in a bar who was solving equations on a napkin. I told her to look for his unknown."

"My girlfriend and I broke up because of a difference in religious beliefs. She didn't believe I was God."

"I'm really glad that Obama won in 2008 and was able to be the first black president of the United States of America his back up job was to be the first white president of Kenya."

"I'm getting so pissed off with my new psychiatrist. I'm sure he's only treating my paranoia for the money."

"That group of millionaires owned by that one millionaire is beating that other group of millionaires owned by that other millionaire. Yes!!!"