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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like a surgeon likes his patients Drugged and Unconscious"

"If Canada was a Kingdom, PM Stephen Harper would be a King... ...but Canada is a country."

"Did you hear about the Hollywood actress that got murdered...? Person 1: Her name was Reese, errr, Reese, Reese whatshername... Person 2: Witherspoon? Person 1: No, with a knife."

"Hansel and Gretel is a timeless tale about the importance of killing old ladies."

"Why do pop artists hate shoe shopping? They have too many ft. *edit for spelling"

"Dark and or Offensive :] I don't know where I stand on abortion. I like killing babies, but I don't like giving women a choice."

"Why is physics inherently racist? There's only two types of bodies: the free body and the black body."

"What did the German physicist use to drink his beer? Ein stein. - From Big Nate, as told by my kid."

"What do you call it when an Asian composer really needs the bathroom? Rover Flows Out Of You."

"I undo his overall strap & slide it off a barely perceptible shoulder. I pull his steel work goggle down around his ""neck"" ""BanaNA"" he moans"