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Joke of the Day
"""What are you reading?"" Great Expectations. ""Is it any good?"" It's not all I hoped for."
Next Joke
"How is a girlfriend like a pronoun? Your's is possessive"
"dates 1-4: let me tell u about my extremely normal hobbies and interests date 5: i don't think the moon is real"
"okay, so you're definitely the best at keeping your body completely still, what do you want, atrophy?"
"The Galactic Empire, after the destruction of the Death Star, has taken to bowling during the interim. The Empire Strikes Back, they call it."
"What happens after someone kills a joke? It goes to Valhaha."
"Sometimes I wake up moody... The other times, i let her sleep."
"Eventually one of these Republican congressmen is going to find out his daughter is a woman, and then we're all set."
"What helps humans get laid but is deadly for fish? Pick up lines"
"Have you heard of Evil Knievals brother Ku Klux Knievel? He once tried to jump 50 black mean on a steamroller."