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Joke of the Day

"Want to avoid making excuses when people ask you to hang out? Always say no when someone asks ""wanna hear something amazing?"""

"Two men walk into a bar. The third one should've seen it coming."

"What did the woman with dissociative identity disorder tell her psychologist? ""Let me be Frank with you."""

"How does Dracula like to have his food served? In bite-sized pieces."

"I was born in California."" ""Which part?"" ""All of me."""

"Police Chief: Why did you arrest that doctor? Officer: He was trying to take someone's pulse."

"Chuck Norris uses pens on Scantron sheets."

"What did the scientist say after discovering the medicinal content of homeopathic remedies ? 0mg !!!!"

"Knock Knock....who's there? SUPRISE MUTHER FUCKER!"

"Why can't Edward leave Russia this winter? He'll be Snowden."