155613

Joke of the Day

"If I could teach my kid anything it would be do not attempt to lay on my face. Give me my personal space please, tiny leech."

"Democrats do much of their shopping at Target and Wal-Mart. So do Republicans but they don't admit it."

"Why did God create men? Because vibrators can't mow the lawn."

"What did the seven dwarves say when Snow White finally woke up? Well, it looks like its back to jerking off."

"why didn't jimmy drive the tractor? Because he had no legs. Why didn't he have any legs? Because he was a potato."

"What's the difference between a bitch and a whore? A whore will sleep with anyone, a bitch will sleep with anyone but you."

"The worst puns are hot dog puns."

"I'm always disappointed when I board a plane and there's no handsome man running after me to stop me. Thanks, hollywood."

"There's a girl that I hate in my office that's white but looks like 'Precious'. I've been calling her ""Pressure"" & blaming my farts on her."

"How can you go without sleep for seven days and not be tired? Sleep at night"