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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when cross the Dukes of Hazzard car with K.I.T.T. ? General Lee speaking."

"I tried to impress a girl by putting my foot down on the pedal... ..turns out she'd seen a bin open like that before."

"I don't know who's worse, the people who sign their cats' names on Christmas cards, or the cats who refuse to sign."

"Girls are like blackjack. I'm trying to go for 21 but I always hit on 14."

"The 9-year-old in me thinks life is all about fun. But then I think, how long is it gonna take to digest this kid? I'm a huge python, btw."

"Pretty sure Craigslist is just a secret genetics lab and they send out their failed experiments to come pick up the stuff you sell there."

"Whats a pirates favourite kind of wood?? Seeder"

"My daughter can open just about any front door using a credit card, so your kids honor roll certificate seems a little useless right now."

"A sandwich walks into a bar... The bartender says we don't serve food here."

"I was given some Sudoku toilet paper. It didn't work. You could only fill it in with number 1s and number 2s"