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Joke of the Day

"""Well, you should have been more specific before I painted all these veins."" - designer of the Wienermobile"

"So I fired my sphere maker... He kept cutting corners."

"[Friend] Kyle, u have to stop referring to your Ballet Club as a ""gang"" [Me & my gang all do 2 pirouettes and stop in unison] ""Not a chance"""

"So a guy gave his friend ten puns hoping one of them would make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did"

"I'm wearing the boxers with the little hearts all over them tonight.... It's probably not a good night to go to jail...."

"Ever see a bottle of TUMS in the mirror? You'll run out of windex..."

"So a special type of animal that can turn into food does not cross something. What a CHICKEN!"

"Out having dinner with friends. One of my friends mentioned the clothes I had on was gay... I told him, ""yes, they came out the closet this morning."""

"How many livers do people have? I want to make sure I have a backup before I put this thing on Ebay."

"If Scientists invent a pill to make us immortal, I guarantee I'd choke to death swallowing it."