153788

Joke of the Day

"Mazda's marketing slogan is ""We Build Mazdas."" They decided on it after rejecting others like: ""Mazdas Are Cars"" and ""Buy Mazdas With Money"""

"I just cut my hand on a box of band aids if you were wondering how I'm doing at life"

"They should do a scene in a comedy movie where someone rides their bike into a parked car."

"You know what they say about a guy with tiny arms? He has tiny legs. (if you know what i mean)"

"What did the gynecologist say to his sedated patient? I don't know, his voice was muffled."

"I bet it's tough being a police sketch artist in China."

"What is the definition of diplomacy? The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip."

"The only thing more shocking than finding water on planet Mars would be finding me in Planet Fitness."

"How do you call a Russian tree? Dimitree"

"Hey suns wearing sunglasses: that's not going to help, stupid. Think about it."