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Joke of the Day
"""When it rains, it pours."" -Shitty weatherman"
Next Joke
"I don't know why I have to jog with you, you're the fat one. ~Dogs"
"Pasta Diet 1.. You walk pasta bakery. 2.. You walk pasta candy store. 3.. You walk pasta Ice Cream shop. 4.. You walk pasta fridge."
"A thief stole my gate the other day, but I didn't report him I was afraid he might take a fence"
"Some guy knocked on my door today and said, ""I have a parcel for your next door neighbour."" I said ""You've got the wrong house then, mate"""
"Why do all black people have nightmares? Because the last one to have a dream got shot."
"Window repairman: What happened did someone try to break into your house? Me: No. My gf said we needed to talk"
"Not only is today Leap Day, but it's also the 52nd anniversary of Family Circus first appearing in newspapers Wow, that's amazing. Just think about it. That's the same joke told 19,028 different ways"
"TIL that it is difficult to be a good person as there is only so small a distance between an asshole and a pussy."
"I'm a bad person... (NSFW) Why can't you fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday."