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Joke of the Day

"What do you call it when a pastry kills another pastry? Game of Scones."

"[Very Racist] What is the difference between a black person and a bench? One can support a family of four."

"Why is your face all scratched ? My girlfriend said it with flowers. How romantic. Not really she hit me round the head with a bunch of thorny roses !"

"What's the difference between Lamar Odom and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and reuse it."

"Why don't women run fast?? cause they hate getting fat!! edit: It's physics. The faster an object moves, the heavier it gets."

"My Dad got a new Lexus for my Mom this Mother's Day. He says it's the best trade he's ever made."

"Watching tv with 4 and now he knows the word crescent. All I learned as a kid was how hard to hit a cat with a frying pan without killing it"

"What did the vegan say when he saw someone familiar? I've seen herbivore."

"A good way to start a conversation is 'What's your favorite color'. A good way to end a conversation is What's your favourite colour of a person."

"I want to make a series about the murder of an airline crew but I still have to shoot the pilot."