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Joke of the Day

"Q: What did Snow White say when she dropped off her film? A: ""Some day my prints will come."""

"If you can't do what's right you can always do what's left"

"Whats the difference between acne and a Priest? Acne doesn't cum on a boys face until he is 13."

"I'm thinking about opening a veterinary clinic for female dogs with broken legs. Gonna call it ""Bitches Be Trippin"""

"I was trying to think up some squirrel puns. But, they were all too nutty."

"In my day cartoons made sense. Chipmunks did all the rescue rangering and a rich duck swam in gold coins like they were water"

"What did the alphabet have before it took a shit? A vowel movement."

"Why ""Trojan"" condoms? Didn't the Trojan horse burst open & thousands of little guys poured out? Less than stellar marketing."

"*on the subway* CUTE GUY: [mouths ""hi""] PRETTY GIRL: [mouths ""hi"" back] ME, IN BETWEEN THEM: [exaggeratedly mouths ""YOU GUYS LIKE HOTDOGS""]"

"When my wife tells me to wear sunscreen and I refuse to listen, it shows that I am my own man who is badly sunburned."