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Joke of the Day

"What did Hitler say when he rose to power? Give me all Germany. (Ger-money) Yeah I'm sorry. On my way out."

"Which teachers care the most about their students? Math teachers, because every student counts."

"I'm learning how to play the neurotic guitar. It's a lot like an acoustic guitar but it's a little more high strung."

"What does a Jewish pedophile say? Want to buy a candy?"

"SANTA: I don't need a surveillance guy. I see all! ELF ON SHELF: Seen these? [shows pics of Mommy kissing Santa Claus] S: When can u start"

"Why do rabbits make good mathematicians? Because they're constantly multiplying!"

"my 2 yr old today: Mom how'd you get past the cognitivie dissonance of having me even tho climate change will render the world uninhabitable"

"How can you tell a skinhead is shaved down there When the carpet matches the drapes"

"Did you hear about the snail who bought himself a Ferrari and painted a big yellow ""S"" on the side? Now wherever he drives, people watch and say ""Look at that S-car go!"""

"What's Jay-z's favorite store? Bed, bath and Beyond-ce."