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Joke of the Day

"What's grey, has four legs, howls at the moon, and eats cement? A wolf. I threw in the cement to make it hard."

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"[LPT] Choose the song you hate the most as your alarm tone and place your phone as far as possible Then turn your phone off and sleep like a champion."
"I don't know the full history of US and Canada but somehow we've got joint custody of geese"
"I had a bad diarrhea few days back... Someone online suggested I should try potatoes. I've showed one up by butt and I haven't taken a shit in 3 days! Thanks stranger!"
"How does a racist joke start? With a small loan of a million dollars"
"I'm really irritated by people that are missing phalanges. I guess I'm lactose intolerant."
"If I got kidnapped I'd continuously sing Pitbull songs until they kill me, I'd die but at least they'd suffer too."
"What do you call a shity poet? A poo'et"
"What are the pros and cons of wearing two watches? On one hand, you have a watch... But on the other hand, you have a watch."
"In the Phoenix airport & I just heard a guys laptop say ""you've got mail"". Pretty sure I've landed in 1998."