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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a repeat line cutter? A pair of scissors."

"5 MINUTES & NO LIKES'? Well then... *deletes status*"

"In 1969 we put a man on the moon... In 2016 we put a man in the ladies restroom."

"Why did the pervert cross the road? He couldn't get his dick out of the chicken"

"I made fun of my friend for getting off to humiliation porn. He came."

"a midget started a fight in... a mini-bar"

"Some of the best decisions I've ever made involved me clicking cancel instead of send."

"When I manage a troupe of Eastern European acrobats... they're going to be called ""Czechs and Balances"", it's the only logical choice."

"What is the lifespan of an owl? 6 1/2 books."

"If I ever opened up a nail salon, I would definitely name it ""Handjobs""."