152767

Joke of the Day

"Niagara Falls A guide was showing Niagara-Falls to a man from Texas and said; I'll bet you don't have anything like this in Texas. The Texan said; nope, but in Texas we have plumbers who can fix it."

"I've been cheating on you guys. Lately, I've been spending my time on my job and real life. They don't mean anything to me, I swear."

"Why don't you ever watch old people have sex? You ever spread open a grilled cheese?"

"What doesn't kill you, tries again."

"So, a friend of the bride gives her a wedding gift... It is an Elsa mug. Why? Cause she should have let him go."

"what was the last thing that went through Jane Wicker's mind? The Ground."

"Hitting on girls at the bar is like payday I never get the number I asked for."

"Why do girls have nipples? Because without them tits would be pointless."

"I don't care about heaven when I die I just want to know which words I used the most and how many bears I unknowingly walked by &other stats"

"Guess who just got laid! Not me. Probably someone, but not me."