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Joke of the Day

"Oh, so you're a Shania Twain fan, eh? That don't impress me much..."

"Why won't Hillary ever pull out? She's never finished screwing people."

"Adding Up by Juan & Juan"

"How did the Scot die? He got kilt."

"Did you hear about the casino croupier whose hand, through a tragic accident, was reduced to a stub? Don't worry, he's dealing with it."

"*pulls away from kissing, stares intently into his eyes Your eyes are like pools of melted chocolate Him: U started your diet, didn't u"

"I don't care how old I am, I will see Finding Dory."

"I dropped my ice cream cone on the ground and it landed pointy end up which made the Earth, at least for a moment, one giant topping."

"Size matters... My penis looks huge when it's next to a map."

"how i met you're grammar"