152470

Joke of the Day

"""Why'd the chicken cross the road?"" ""Why Daddy?"" ""To get to the other side!"" ""Did it look both ways?"" ""It was a...yes. Yes it did."""

"Why did the smartphone go to jail... [OC] Because it was charged with battery"

"The NSA The only part of the government that actually listens"

"What do you get when you have sex with an Alligator? Gatoraids"

"[The Bachelor] Some of you will be getting roses tonight... [bee in the back] AW HELL YEAH"

"How do you save a Republican from drowning? Take your foot off of their head."

"So another way of saying a no-brainer would be...? A Kurt-Cobainer..."

"PS3 messin around I need a picture of a 16 year old girl that is believable, not suspicious. Please don't ask why, I'm just a bit messed up in the brain"

"I slept with 4 girls last night... And the floor of the hotel room killed my back."

"wife: That guy is texting and driving! That is so dangerous! me [holding a donut in each hand and steering with my knee]: So dangerous"