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Joke of the Day

"It's important when dieting to reward yourself and take a break. Then, when you return to your diet a decade later you're all set to go"

Next Joke
 
"Five chickens leave Topeka traveling west at 25 mph. Please help me find them chickens. Those are my chickens."
"Mary, they told me your son is gay That's bullshit. The gay one is his boyfriend! His boyfriend!"
"What's the difference between ""Fake News"" and CNN? I don't know Reddit, that's why I'm asking you?"
"What has two O's and fires? A double-vowel shotgun."
"I'm gonna go out on a limb here and maybe Prince Charming just doesn't like whiny bitches?"
"I'm confused about plants"
"What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job"
"This cab driver is THE WORST. I keep telling him ""You passed my house, let me out"" & he's all like ""Sir I'm a cop and your under arrest for public nudity and intoxication."""
"Once killed a man with my SuperSoaker. (I'd been pumping it for a REALLY long time.)"