150984

Joke of the Day

"I overheard a gentleman saying he grew up with Drew Brees, and that he wasn't a very nice person... I said, ""Hey! Drew Brees is a *Saint!*"""

"My sister lost her voice and told me this joke"

"Is a man more intelligent before, during or after sex? During. Because you're plugged into the know it all"

"A ninja turdle is when you poop really fast."

"Tanning Blondes Two blondes walk into a tanning salon. The receptionist asks Are you two sisters? They laughed and replied, No we're not even Catholic."

"From my son: What did the hippopotamus do to the magician? He hippo-tized him!"

"Why can't you see Hippos hiding in trees? Because they're good at it."

"Just got back from the Dollar Store. I bought two cars and a trip to Paris for three bucks."

"Is that your cat? No, she's adopted. Me and my boyfriend, we can't have cats."

"Sometimes I drown cookies in milk in front of their family until they tell me the whereabouts of the Keebler Elves."