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Joke of the Day

"What has everyone been doing at Apple since the problems with the iPhone 6 started? Looking for Jobs."

"Someone just stole my lemon loaf.... Out of everything that happened today, they really took the cake"

"""You're the bomb!"" No, you're the bomb!"" A compliment in America but an argument in the Middle East Too soon?"

"Pretty sure airport food was priced by children just learning about numbers. ""Ok Brian, how much should this apple cost?"" SIXTY TWO DOLLARS!"

"If I had a dollar for every gender there is... I'd have two dollars."

"I've been squeezing the last drop of toothpaste from this tube for over a month now."

"[Followup] I'm not going to drink any more. But I won't drink any less."

"Q: How do you make soup gold? A: You put in fourteen carrots."

"What 6 inches goes to your mouth? Toothbrush...you dirty bastard"

"Lindsay Lohan's personal chef is just a pinata full of cocaine."