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Joke of the Day

"""Statistics show that most shark attacks happen in shallow water."" Really? Maybe cus that's where the ppl are u idiots."

"Wife walks up to husband and asks for money Wife: I need some money to buy a bra Husband: do you think you have breasts big enough to buy a bra? Wife: when you bought boxers, did I say anything?"

"Why did the scarecrow win the Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field."

"What's the difference between a Zippo and a Bic lighter? Zippos are heavy. A Bic is just a little lighter."

"You don't need a hunting licence if you shoot a turkey and plant a very small gun on him."

"You can convince people to go anywhere with the promise of free food."

"I like my women how I like my coffee, with little or no pubic hair."

"""Give it here!"" ""No, it's mine!"" ""it's my turn!"" ""you had it last!"" ""come on gimme it!"" ""no way!"" ""but it's my go!"" Siamese twins having a wank."

"What do you call a second hand gold necklace? Recyc-bling (I'm pretty sure I thought of this myself but I used to smoke the Mary Jane a lot so......)"

"If your mouse doesn't work, what is it? Unemployed."