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Joke of the Day

"It's amazing how eating such a small amount of dog food can cause such a large amount of concern from the people at the pet store."

"Funny talks make smile always. A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often."

"What's the difference between an old Greyhound terminal and a lobster with really big boobs? One is a crusty bus station the other is a busty crustation! ::buh dum bum::"

"Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar ? He wanted sweet and sour pork !"

"I always let the other person have the last word. I just ignore them mid-conversation."

"My wife thinks I am a pedophile... but what the hell does she know..shes only 12!!"

"During the stone age, long before Facebook, man was already experiencing the desire to express on a wall what he had eaten."

"Why are iPhones' batteries not called apple juice Because they don't have enough juice in them ^Explanation: ^circlejerk ^on ^iPhone's ^battery ^running ^out ^fast don't kill me pls, i love apple ^yay"

"Thursday is like your high school boyfriend. It feels good but you know something better is right around the corner."

"Me: I played this as a kid. It's from back when video games made sense 6-year-old: Why did you jump on a turtle? Me: Because I'm a plumber"