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Joke of the Day
"I just tried an inverted yoga pose that my friend told me about... it was highly rectum-ended"
Next Joke
"A woman sends her logician husband to the shops. ""Get me a loaf of bread,"" she said, ""and if they have eggs, get me a dozen."" The husband returns from the shop with twelve loaves of bread."
"[shopping for make-up] ""Excuse me, what will make my eyes pop?"" ""I know exactly what you need."" [boots you into the vacuum of deep space]"
"ELEVATOR SHOES Q: What's yellow and goes up and down? A: A banana in an elevator."
"What is the difference between a paycheck and a cock? You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!"
"Two snowmen are standing in a snowy field... And after 3 hours of complete silence, one turns to the other and asks ""Can you smell carrots?"""
"Don't worry, Pope Benedict XVI, I get it. Mondays make me want to quit my job too."
"You're never too old to learn stupid shit."
"What do you call a Chinese man with a bad internet connection? Hi Ping"
"I'm just a girl trying to keep up with a guy on my Fitbit challenge who may be walking out more sexual frustration than me"