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Joke of the Day

"Mum Can I have a dog for Christmas ? No you can have turkey like everyone else !"

"Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard? Someone told him he should get an apple Mac"

"Helium walks into a bar... ...and the bartender says to him, ""We don't serve Noble gasses here!"". Helium... doesn't react."

"I only believe in 12.5% of everything the Bible says. Which makes me an eighth theist."

"When's the best time to see an optometrist? When you can't."

"What is Kanye's favorite Transformer? Bruce Jenner"

"A priest, a paedophile and a rapist walk into a bar... He sits down and orders a drink."

"Q: Did you hear the slogan for the the new ""Stealth Condom?"" A: ""They'll never see you coming."""

"I once ate an exclamation mark... it was surprisingly good."

"50's kids probably won't have this... Parents"