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Joke of the Day
"It costs over $235,000 for parents to raise a child today... And that's just for the alcohol."
Next Joke
"How many calories does avoiding eye contact burn?"
"If my neighbors are gonna get angry every time I see them... why did I even buy the binoculars?"
"A classic Tommy Cooper gag * I said to the gym teacher: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' * He said: 'How flexible are you?' * I said: 'I can't make Tuesdays.'"""
"fuck homosexuals... ...in the ass, only if both of the people involved agree to do it consciously and consensually"
"put ur hair in a man-bun. now put ur beard in a man-bun too. congratulations ur now a hamburger. be free, hamburger man."
"Job interview: ""what would you say is your biggest achievement is to date"" ""I once wore a hat to bed and it was still on in the morning"""
"What kind of pizza would the twin towers order? Two plains."
"Did you hear the one about the deaf guy? Neither did he ... /Badump-psh."
"It was so cold out today.. I saw a lawyer walking down the street with his hands in his own pockets."