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Joke of the Day

"How many cops shootings does it take to have an indictment? Error [value unknown]"

"Russia doesn't have a online TV streaming service. It's called Nyet-Flix."

"Brad Pitt: lets get back together Jennifer Anniston : We broke up 12 years ago!!! Brad pitt: We were on a break!"

"Ben and Kyle are talking. Kyle says to Ben I had a one night stand. To which Ben replied what do you have now?"

"FYI wearing camouflage at your desk so no one sees you masturbating doesn't work."

"Q: What's the difference between a blonde and an ironing board? A: It's difficult to open the legs of an ironing board."

"How many Vietnam vets does it take to screw in a light bulb? YOU DON'T FUCKING KNOW, YOU WASN'T THERE!"

"My Somalian friend asked me the other day... If I had ever tried Somalian food. ""No, I've never had any,"" I said. ""That's all right,"" he said, ""neither have Somalians."""

"My dog understands four words: his name, food, outside and Antidisestablishmentarianism."

"I went to the races yesterday. The horse I bet on was so slow, the jockey kept a diary of the trip."