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Joke of the Day

"CAPT. AMERICA: Merry Christmas, Hulk! Happy Hanukkah, The Thing! Er... what religion are you, Thor? THOR: Do you understand I'm an actual god"

"How is Donald Trump like a VW Bug? They both spew toxic hot air disguised as being good for Americans."

"Miracles do happen even on Facebook and Twitter. Come Sunday and suddenly everyone becomes a preacher."

"Whenever you're having a bad day, think of the guy who has to put the circus tent back in its bag."

"So a clown gets eaten by a shark..."

"A magician is driving down a road... and turns into a driveway."

"I am wearing a jacket, because my mom felt cold."

"What did the Marine Biologist say when he saw two eels making love? ""It's a Moray."""

"Hi, I'm hosting a charity disco & raffle next Saturday 29nd September, to raise money for people who struggle to reach orgasm. If you can't come let me know."

"Tomorrow I'm definitely going to start running, no matter how many days it takes!"