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Joke of the Day

"It would be totally gay if Elon Musk opened a gas company in the future. Not because it will be out of trend but because it will be named GasX."

"I had sex with a pregnant woman last night Was also my first threesome"

"I was going to bring everyone on reddit some cool plants but unfortunately, I never botany"

"What's the best part about being a meth addict? 3 sleeps 'til Christmas"

"How do I stay in shape? I stole an ostrich, it chases me around the house all day, i hate it"

"Just sprayed Febreeze in my bathroom.. Now it smells like shitrus."

"Prosecutor: Mr. Clinton did you have an improper relationship with Monica Lewinsky? Pres: Improper? ... Ain't nothing improper about that. That was one of the the sweetest interns I've ever had."

"Women that date guys with bad grammar are the goodest."

"I woke up today feeling like a god! I don't believe in myself. :("

"Q:What did the German Police office say to his nipple. A:*You are under a vest.*"