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Joke of the Day

"Why did the butcher get fired? For bringing home the bacon."

"I hate when you're trying to be cheesy but everyone is laughtose intolerant."

"My friends definitely cannot handle their alcohol. Last night they dropped me 3 times carrying me out of the bar"

"Tofu is really overrated It's just a curd to me."

"Why did ginny make harry get rid of his invisibility cloak? He kept coming out of no where"

"You see those cows over there? They are outstanding in their field."

"I once tried to be a cat... It didn't go pur-fectly, but it went well... ( )"

"A police officer came up to me yesterday and said, ""Where were you between four and six?"" I said, ""Kindergarten."""

"ok boss, i duck taped the hostage's mouth shut ""you mean duct taped, right?"" um... *cuts to hostage with live mallard stuffed in his mouth*"

"What's the difference between a hooker and a dead baby? One makes you feel sick and the other one is free!"