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Joke of the Day
"What's heavier, 200 pounds of bricks or 200 pounds of feathers? Your mother."
Next Joke
"Make new friends by waking up strangers with forehead kisses after they've fallen asleep on the train."
"Pouring water on someone's head to promote something is kinda weird. Now that I've gotten that out of the way, let's go baptize some babies."
"""The problem with quotes on the Internet is that they're not always accurate."" - Albert Einstein"
"How can you tell when a bar is haunted? It's full of Boo's and Spirits."
"New rule for football: when a player is at the bottom of a pile after being tackled everyone on top has to whisper to him a compliment"
"My daughter reached that age where they start asking embarrassing questions about sex The last one was ""is that all you got?"""
"I tried to get into the knife sharpening academy I didn't make the cut."
"Don't worry if you are spending the Christmas all alone because everyone will eventually die xD"
"Stupid Joke I'd like to name my kid buoyancy, but whatever floats your boat."